Valentine is Cancelled…

…because cupid died. JK. But I can’t stand Valentine’s Day. It’s so cruel. Oh, where are my manners?

Wazuuuuuuuuup! Welcome to 2020 and if you are a first time reader, welcome to my blog.

It feels good to finally came out of the closet…of writing rot. I missed you guys. Who missed me? I know you did. *side eye*

Pheew. Is it just me or this year is really speeding by? I’m still trying to catch up with the year. Good thing I had all that training from pursuing molue as a kid.

Meanwhile, Am I the only one who can’t wait for Valentine’s day to come and go so we can finally hear word? I know you are probably giving me the stank eye but na you sabi. Valentine is overrated. I said it. It’s just another excuse for people to congest every single mall, restaurant and hangout spot in town, just like they do on Christmas, New Years and the likes. Can’t y’all stay in your houses? *rme*

I have nothing against the display or celebration of love. I love; love, love stories and happily ever afters. But you see this valentine? It’s a scam and I’ve got no love for it because of what it turns people to. And here’s why.

  • The Pressure on Men to go all out
Valentine is Cancelled...

Let’s be honest, women are more vested in this Valentine’s day thingy. For one, they feel entitled to a gift. Or several. All they think is, “What will he get me?” or “Where will he take me?” Some will even outrightly tell their guys what they want, adding terms and conditions untop o.

These things are not bad in themselves but the moment you are making a man feel less of himself because of your demand and supply chain, you have graduated into full blown witchcraft. You people should just fear God and better match up that energy in treating your men. They deserve to be pampered too. And those ones that compare their bf/husband with their friends’, please can you just tell your friends to accept you as second gf/wife instead? You are welcome.

  • The Broken Expectations
Valentine is Cancelled...

I still don’t get why people like to set themselves up for disappointments. There are a lot of ladies out there who will go get their manicures done because their village people have whispered in their ears that this is the day he will finally pop the question. You know, the question that causes the leaking eye syndrome.

I think it’s a bit unfair on the guys. Uncle probably just wants to spend that day with you and treat you to a good time. But no. Your eyes will be dashing up and down the restaurant, monitoring every person moving like they are part of a surprise package. Madam, eat your food and enjoy the ambience. Don’t ruin the night.

Some will even get their proposal but not in the way they have envisioned. Then they start acting up because Emeka did not jump down with parachute or buy them a rock as big as olumo. Weh done ma. And I heard some women re-enact their proposal so it will be Instagram worthy. Lmao. Those ones need to see a psychiatrist.

  • The Social Media Rat Race
Valentine is Cancelled...

I just hate social media for what it has become. All that fakeness with everyone trying to outshine everyone. The Association of Pepper Them Gang (APT-G) will come out full force that day. From showing off their expensive gifts, to the brand-new car their ‘bf’ got them, to pictures of ‘baecation’ from exotic locations.

Some of these girls are out there buying stuffs for themselves or leasing them and claiming it’s from one guy. If you say you bought it for yourself, will you die? WILL YOU DIE? Set awon ‘surprise-from-bae’ gang. E continue.

  • The stupid decisions.
Valentine is Cancelled...
Recipe for 50 shades of walk of shame

Don’t even get me started on this one. Tobi is the kind of guy you normally won’t give a second glance. But society has conditioned you into believing if you are alone on that day, you are missing out on the next best thing. You then accept Tobi’s invite to go out.

There’s scented candles, flowers, red wine, blues playing in the background, every love quote on the internet and all those things guys do when they want to go in for the kill. Before you know it, you are all up in fake feelings and Tobi has off your pant.

Don’t be that girl.

Delete those old chats. Do not dial that number. Leave their messages on read. All those ‘hey, big head’ on the night of Feb 13 are from the pit of hell. Flee! Don’t let loneliness make you do something you’d regret the next morning. If you don’t want to be alone, spend time with family, friends or colleagues.

And if you are single-pringle in this valentine season, don’t let anyone pepper you into thinking you are missing out on anything special because you are abso-freaking-lutely not. Who best to show some love if not yourself? *snaps fingers*

My loves, spoil yourself. Don’t wait for any man or woman to make you feel special. You are already special. And it’s totally fine if you don’t want to do anything either. Stay in and spend your day/night like every other Friday. Dem no dey arrest person for that one. Joo get?

Meanwhile, who remembers their first valentine’s gift? Mine was in SS1. My friend got me a lip gloss and hair ribbon. I was on low cut, guys. Low. Cut. And I was next to her when she was buying these things. How did she actually miss that? We did have a good laugh and it will always be a cherished memory.

Fun fact: Did you know Valentine’s week is a thing? It starts exactly a week to valentine’s day, on the 7th of February. You are welcome.

Stay safe guys. Till we meet again, Love and Light.

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